Lord I’m Willing, Help Me To Want It!

Something was really wrong with me…

I believed I was going to die. Every night as I laid down to go to bed, I was afraid that this would be my final night on earth. I was tethered to this idea that something bizarre was going to happen, like maybe my heart would simply stop beating while I was deep in my sleep. Then would come the worrisome thoughts flooding my mind, driving me deeper into an already anxious state. Who would take care of my children? Do they know I love them? Have I done enough for them? Who would love my wife? What would happen to her without me? What would it be like for my family to experience my sudden death?  Continue reading Lord I’m Willing, Help Me To Want It!

Finding My Joy

A little over eight years ago I was invited to join the Sandals Church staff. It was an act of surrendering one way of life for another. I was asked to pioneer the concepts of spiritual formation and soul care, planting seeds and nurturing them into the into the patchwork of our church landscape. Not really sure how to go about this, I simply began meeting with people and practicing the craft of listening, attending and intercessory prayer. I wasn’t picky with my appointments. I figured if they wanted to meet with me, then I would make time to listen to them while simultaneously listening to God on their behalf. The goal was for us to discover God’s invitation to them in their season of life, so that they might be able to surrender to be more in step with Christ.

Quickly the word got out, and before I knew it my calendar was filled with one-on-one conversations with people desperate for a word from the Holy Spirit. I was drowning in the demand, finding it most difficult to keep up with the pressing needs of the people, as well as the other requirements that came with being a pastor.  Continue reading Finding My Joy