Present In Pain

I wore a suit two times this weekend.

One for a wedding. One for a funeral.

I got asked a few times how I was doing and the general state of my heart. I didn’t really have a good answer outside of “okay”. Not because I wanted to avoid sharing deeply about what I was feeling in my heart. Not because I was numb to emotion after being in ministry all these years. Not because I was unaware of how I felt. The reason I answered “ok” was intentional, and encompassed the truth of how I was: somewhere in the middle of sadness and anger and joy and celebration.  Continue reading Present In Pain

A Confidence Gained

I was sitting on the floor of my bedroom, completely frustrated and defeated. I was trying so hard to do what I believed to be right but seemed to be failing in every regard. My relationships were difficult and seemed to be more drama than benefits. I wasn’t finding success at work and with my job also being my ministry, I felt the weight of failure weigh heavy on my shoulders. I couldn’t even balance my budget! With Bible open and journal furiously scribbled upon, I had come to an impasse. “God, I don’t know what to do. I really need to hear from you. Please.” What I heard next changed my life. Continue reading A Confidence Gained

A Chance Well Taken

When a piece of your past comes back around it can be an opportunity to either shrink back from that pain or stand tall remembering the growth that has occurred. Things like bumping into an ex, hearing a certain song or seeing an old picture are moments that measure that growth, just to name a few. Or in my case, like having to get a police report from a past offense so you can move forward in the foster/adoption process.

Continue reading A Chance Well Taken